stumbling along

Thanks to everyone who has written to me to give support and love. I really appreciate it. I’m starting to come out of my fog and try to start figuring out what comes next. So many things to do. Separation of property. Deciding what to do about the house. Sorting through my own feelings.

I think we will sell the house, which kind of breaks my heart into little tiny pieces, but the town where we live is very far from my work, my friends, and where I want my life to be. T. can’t do the house on her own, and I would need to get a roommate if I wanted to keep it. I can buy another house someday. Right now I need to be close to friends and focus on making my life as simple as possible.

I have a therapist. I have friends and family who love me. Right now I’m still exhausted and trying to get over a terrible cold. I’m going home (to Oregon) for Thanksgiving and that will be good. In three to six months things will all be much better. I’m not sure what will happen in the meantime. I may need to find a small temporary situation (to live in) until I figure out what’s what. Maybe I should look at putting stuff in storage and just renting a room for a few months. I don’t know. Maybe being a nomad for a while wouldn’t be terrible. I hate moving and I am not sure I’m really in the right frame of mind to figure out exactly what’s going to work for me, right now.

I’ll keep posting small updates here as things move along. I am reading hardly at all although I am listening to all the Harry Potter books on CD in the car, and they are wonderfully distracting. Mostly I just come home, eat a little something and go to bed. Sometimes I manage to watch an episode of trashy TV. I’m looking forward to whatever comes next, but as reality is settling in, I’m feeling a little overwhelmed and of course very sad. Simple is good. One thing at a time is good. I wish I were all strong and take-charge but right now I’m a little shaky and just taking things slow.

Although I can barely make a page-a-night progress in my current book, I’d love book recommendations, if anyone has something inspiring and/or comforting.

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8 thoughts on “stumbling along

  1. you sound well. more or less. there hasnt been a day gone by where you havent been in my thoughts. you can get through this.

    im really sorry about the house. i know that was a dream of yours and im so sorry it couldnt last.

  2. …I am sorry you are going thru such a hard time..and I do know that divorce is a very hard time..btdt… as for a book to read.. find one of your absolute favorite books and read it again.. I always find that comforting.

  3. In life-transition times I have never not felt hopeful after reading Daddy Long-legs by Jean Webster. It pulls me in every time. I even found an audio version with a decent narrator. –Just checked my library system, looks like they discarded the tapes, so unfortunately I can’t tell you who the reader was!

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